This is going to be nuts.

So last week I was talking about FIDLAR yeah? You know? Loud, drugs, driving, exciting and all that shit. Well guess what, it’s tour time for FIDLAR bitches! Now no band goes a tour alone, or at least not very often, and FIDLAR certainly didn’t plan on flying solo. I introduce you to their touring pals, The Orwells. Little Chicago suburb band, not seeming very special by any means, Only one album released, small talk stuff you know? Oh, I guess I forgot one thing. THESE GUYS ONLY GRADUATED FROM HIGHSCHOOL THIS FUCKING YEAR! Yes, they only graduated highschool in January and are now on a national tour with FIDLAR. Now I’m no expert, but that’s pretty fucking crazy. These cats aren’t even 19 yet man and they’re touring nationally, and yes I’m aware there are plenty of bands who have done that; but we’re talking punk rock here not mass produced, mass sensationalized, flipped hair, I-I-I am a huge dickhead pretty boy pop music. This is punk rock, there aren’t tween girls touching themselves to this music and if there is; please call me. So here’s a pretty bitchin song by them

Yeah man, they’re tight and I sincerely hope they keep playing music. I don’t know what it is about them that’s so awesome because really, they’re nothing special. For some reason though I love everything about them, I’m especially digging their singer. Just a wicked weirdo that wears cool shirts and stuff.

Not all punkers are huge, loud, aggressive assholes though. So naturally these boys have a softer side. I would recommend using this following  song as foreplay before you decide to fuck your significant other. It should bring you both back to a time when you danced in high school, the dudes trying not to touch the girls with their boners and the girls trying to avoid the dudes gnarly hard-ons. Point is, these guys fucking rock and everybody should go see them sometime this year, I know I am.

See you shitheads later
– Love, your father.

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